Super-sensitivity — Curse or Blessing?
Many feel like they are outsiders because they are deeply affected by things that barely register for others. In such instances, they often hear comments like “Don’t take it to heart!” or “Be tougher!” or “You need to be more selfish!”
They stand perplexed before these seemingly incomprehensible directives, feeling as if something is very wrong with them. However, the super-sensitive, often labeled as weak or hysterical, are very valuable both for society and their immediate environment.
If you haven’t yet found answers to the following questions, then you most likely belong to the super-sensitive camp:
“Why do I tire in just half an hour amidst the crowd at Times Square when everyone else seems to be enjoying themselves?”
“Why can’t I push for a promotion without issue, when our colleagues do it effortlessly?”
“Why can’t I sleep on a mattress that’s too soft or too hard, while others snore peacefully around me?”
“Why do I tear up when seeing cruelty on TV, even though everyone says, ‘It’s just a movie’?”
“Why can I instantly sense the mood of someone entering the room, while others have no clue?”
Dr. Elaine Aron was the first to talk about super-sensitive people after conducting extensive research and in-depth interviews on the subject. It turns out that 15–20% of the population belongs to this group.
Super-sensitive individuals typically:
Are highly empathetic, often overly selfless
Are cooperative, not competitive
Connect deeply and easily with their peers
Experience life with high emotional amplitude
Notice more details from their surroundings than average people
Process problems and situations more profoundly due to the abundance of information
Absorb almost everything from their environment, tiring quickly in stimulus-rich surroundings
Constantly analyze gathered information
Possess strong intuition
Have a strong inner compass about what’s right and wrong
Since super-sensitivity is genetically coded, it’s futile to try and change it. It’s like telling someone they’re too short and should be taller. Wearing high heels might hide their actual height, but it won’t make them taller. Often, super-sensitive individuals are viewed as weak or as having drawn a short straw in the genetic lottery, prompting many to wear metaphorical high heels to hide their “flaw”. But this approach often causes more internal conflict than results.
15–20% of people, or one and a half billion individuals, are super-sensitive, with half of them being male. Males who are expected to be strong and tough by societal standards.
Dr. Elaine Aron was the first to clarify that a phenomenon present in such a significant portion of the population isn’t a disease but a trait. So, let’s not try to make sheep wear wolves’ clothing, instead, consider the enormous contributions super-sensitive people can make to better the world.
In past centuries, those with such unique abilities were more valued
They observed more of the world, analyzed deeper, and thus made clearer and well-founded decisions. Noticing minute details and possessing empathy often led to innovations that made life more comfortable. Their empathy and broad emotional range have given birth to astonishing artistic creations and foundations that better the lives of the underprivileged globally. Humanitarian missions are often borne by the super-sensitive as they are driven to act more by others’ suffering.
It’s not to say that only the super-sensitive can change the world or that every one of them is a genius. But understand that they too are indispensable parts of this colorful world. If we listen to them and give them space, instead of trying to fix them, they bring gifts of empathy, humanity, selflessness, integrity, and abundant creativity. And admit it, we sorely need all of these in our often hot-headed, aggressive, and greedy world.
– Eszter
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